October 2020 Book of the Month
“Handbook for Those Who Grieve… What You Should Know and What You Can Do During Times of Loss”
by Martin M. Auz and Maureen Lyons Andrews
Reviewed by Anita Finley
I thought I was over mourning my husband’s passing in January 2017, as I am very busy with our business and other activities. After reading this book, I realize I have more to mourn and think about. And my dearest mother, who passed in 2003, was a second reason I fully recognized the value of this book.
Handbook for Those Who Grieve is not a casual book about loss, mourning and grief. The authors, Martin Auz and Maureen Andrews are experienced grief recovery experts and counselors and have organized their book into a variety of sections, all specific to people’s losses. If you lost a spouse, a child, a pet…they have good advice to help you think through what you can do, to get moving in a positive direction. I, for one, was very sad about my husband dying. He had not been ill, so it was a shock to me and our family. I can’t even imagine how difficult it must be when someone has suffered through years of pain and suffering and then passes. In some ways, people are relieved when a loved one has found peace. However, the loss is never easy.
There are always families, friends and co-workers who want to say the caring things to make the mourning easier. The authors deal with many different circumstances of loss and they found that often people just don’t know what to say to someone who is in mourning, so they have provided sample letters to share for many specific situations and understand all the issues involved when there is a loss. They wanted to utilize their years of experience and wrote this book to help allay the difficult emotions that occur in the death of a loved one.
This handbook is so useful as it covers all types of death, from mourning a spouse, a parent, a brother or sister or even a pet. Each death carries with it certain feelings that can emerge as anger, confusion, bewilderment, devastation, disbelief, and even non-caring. In order to deal with each of these emotions without guilt and shame, you need assistance. In many cases, there is a lack of direction and financial hardship. Families are often at odds with decisions made by the spouse or siblings and that adds to the burden of mourning.
Boomer Times specializes in assisting our readers and our audience in finding answers to serious questions and one reason we chose this book as our “Book of the Month” was that we know that many of our readers have faced, are currently facing or will be dealing with these issues in the near future. I especially liked the quote in the book: “A time to weep, a time to laugh, a time to mourn, and a time to dance.” We highly recommend your reading the Handbook for Those Who Grieve.
About the authors:
Martin M. Auz began his studies in grief recovery in 1978 and worked on many aspects of organized grief recovery for employees in large institutions.
(Martin passed away a few years ago.) Maureen Lyons Andrews is a founder of a grief recovery program and an active member of several bereavement programs in Chicago. She specializes in working with elders and developing programs for their participation. She lives in Tinley Park, Illinois and spends three months in Hillsboro Beach. Florida during the winter.
To purchase a copy of this book, please go to Amazon.com.